I'm still alive, and I figured that'd be worth letting people know, since apparently half of everyone I know think I've lost it. I haven't, for what it's worth.

Pretty damn lucid, actually. Sometimes that's the problem.

It's hard to pick things up when you're the only one who knew they fell. But I guess since it's not completely out of the realm of possibility, I'll get a few less ugly looks from where I'm standing, here. Especially compared to... well.

Anyway, before anybody asks, I'll be out of here soon, so don't bother asking where I'm staying.

Next stop: Lincoln, Nebraska. I'll figure out where to go from there when I'm finished.

I don't know when I'll be back in Lawrence.

Back home. Started back last night round one and got back about an hour ago.

Yeah, I was a little off about things being finished, but they sure as hell are now. For good this time, or I swear to god, I'm gonna kill Joel. I am not goin' all the way back over there to do this all over again. Repeat performances like that get messy.

Guessing Dad's at work, Katie's at school... dunno where Mom is, but she wasn't here when I got in, so I've got the house to myself for a few hours. Works well enough.

Still, I don't know how long I can stay here. Before I've got to do something about this. Hell, I don't want to, but it's not like I've got a choice. Shouldn't even be typing this.

...interesting something Joel told me while I was talking to him about all this, what I think. Memores acti prudentes futuri. Just typing it so I won't forget it. No frigging kidding, though.

Should be coming home tonight, emphasis on the should. No idea what hour, cos like I said, might not happen, even if I am pretty sure.

I'm just glad if what I was out here doing is finally done. Gonna do a double-check this afternoon and make sure, and if it is, I'll head out around then.

Makes no sense to have an impulse to put details in here. Wrong journal.

Anyway, yeah. That's it.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Okay, so I'm not gonna be home by Tuesday after all. Thursday maybe?

Hopefully.

First time the site's been up in about two weeks, I'm a little surprised. I was pretty sure it wasn't coming back. Funny how you get used to that kind of thing.

Things have been quiet, almost too much and it's weird. Not really as comforting as I guess you'd think it would be. Mostly I've just been working, but did some driving, too.

That reminds me, I'm not gonna be into work tomorrow. Sorry. Got caught up and I'm kinda stuck in Colorado until at least tomorrow night. No big deal, but coming home's not exactly gonna happen until then.

And no, it's not something wrong with the car.

Got a few ideas while I was out here, what I might need to do about a situation or two. Wait and see on that, I guess. Yeah, I know, being a cryptic bastard, deal with it. I'm sure you'll all be able to cope.

On the plus side, at least I'm back in the game.

That's it.

Been reading more of that freaky book. Dunno how I'm supposed to react to it, really, except that it doesn't make any damn sense to me. Or, I guess, it makes sense, but it's not real, doesn't make logical sense. I'm guessing it's not really supposed to, though.

It's worse when it feels like it almost does make sense.

And I still woke up--

Well, nevermind.

I've got some work to do, mostly stuff on the Impala.. little things, 'cos it's better to get them done now than get surprised later.

Picked up a gun the other day, at Cass's. That was new.

Apparently I'm not a bad shot.

So last night I found that book in the Impala's trunk.

Dad said he doesn't know whose it is. Didn't tell him what I read in it, cos I figured that'd just freak him out too, and it's bad enough when it's just us, huh?

It just gets scarier freakier weirder the more I read it.

Last night I

My fucking handwriting is in there. Mine.

Shit.

So, I'm not driving the old car anymore.

This is pretty damn awesome.


Found something in the trunk of the Impala. Anybody lose a book?

Leather-bound, looks pretty old? I've never seen it in there before.

New computer's up and running. We needed a new machine anyway. Dunno what the hell was wrong with the old one. At least there's access again.

I didn't know that was gonna happen to the old one anyway.

The car's closer to running straight now. She's getting me from point A to point B without stalling out, and right now that's all I'm asking for. Even if Kat did try to take out one of the spark plugs. Which-- don't do that again. Those aren't broken.

Anyway, after Monday, she'll at least get me through another couple of months. Good, 'cos I can't afford to replace her right now.

At least it's the weekend. No idea what I'm gonna be doing in advance, though. I'll figure somethin' out. Usually do.

On break, using the shitty dialup in the office since there's nothing else to do.

Went in at 8 this morning, asshole was supposed to show for his car at 10, didn't get here until past 12. Perfect; if he'd just said so I could've gotten some sleep. Having to go in that early on a freaking Saturday for a Beemer is just cruel.

Figure I'll stick around here until 5 and then find something else to do until I pass out. Hopefully not at the wheel. That would suck.

About that, I've gotta do a little work on my own car soon. I can keep 'er alive, but she's not liking me too well lately.

Not used to writing this stuff down.. anyway, that's it.